As I type this, I'm listening to the soundtrack of "Hamilton" (good stuff!) and gazing out the window at a warm, sunny day. Snowless in December is not how I remember the last month of the year from decades past. (Insert a wistful, treehugger-ish sigh here.)
Anyway: The first of December. I think I can already hear the screeching of shopping cart wheels.
I read something the other day from Artifact Uprising that resonated with me: "What if we gave fewer gifts that mattered more?"
Well, the grammar is a bit clunky (almost fooling us into thinking they mean "don't give too many gifts that matter"), but you get the gist. Instead of just filling up your cart this gift-giving season, hurriedly checking names off your list in a mad dash to the holiday finish line, why not choose just a few gifts that actually mean something? Things that won't be discarded or forgotten. Things that are not just things, but more like...feelings.
What represents you that you can give? What is the one thing your loved ones would treasure?
Make no mistake: It won't make your gift-giving list any easier. You'll have to actually think about what you'd like to give, and "Time for Thinking" has lost a lot of its allure in this multi-tasking age.
But, if you're up to the challenge, here are a few posts on the topic of giving gifts in a more meaningful way (and yes, one of them was written by Yours Truly):
And finally, if you know me "In Real Life", you know that I cringe at anything sales-y, but I'd be a clueless dolt if I didn't mention that you could always give someone you love one of my photography e-courses. It doesn't take up any room on the kitchen counter and the skills learned will last for life. A brand-new online course for 2017 will be announced VERY soon, so if you're not yet on my "Writing with Light" subscriber list, do get yourself signed up lickety-split so you can get the first word and the discount. (Sign-up is below.)
Happy Weekend to you, friends--and may it be a mall-free one!
It's a challenge to come up with gifts for Hanukkah when (1) we're already tripping over the kids' overloaded toy supply and (2) we--the parents--don't want any more stuff for ourselves.Giving experiences has become one of our favorite ways to celebrate. But sometimes, you can combine a fun experience with choosing something small (and not pricey) to take home with you.
Case in point: Last Sunday, we combined something that we (our family of four) all love--books--with someplace we all love to visit--Strand Books in New York City. I've written about it before, but it's hard to capture the essence of the Strand in photos because it's just soooooo big and sprawling--four floors of books (most of them secondhand, many out-of-print or rare) taking up a full city block. Yet it's somehow cozy at the same time, as you blissfully meander around the chock-full stacks with everybody else who loves books just as much. It's our collective Happy Place, for sure.
I chose a book that's technically for children but I love it nonetheless: Maps by Aleksandra and Daniel Mizielinska. (I love a book that teaches me a hundred new things on every page.) That's a book I can put on the family room coffee table for everybody to pick up from time to time and devour.
After a quick bite and drink across the street, my husband suggested we walk down to Washington Square. I'm so glad he did (and not just because I love the Henry James book!). The arch was all lit up, framing the big Christmas tree under it. It was already almost impossibly festive, and then a big group of joggers (all wearing Santa hats) launched into "We Wish You a Merry Christmas" to take it right over the top. Even though we don't celebrate Christmas, the sparkling city filled with music and lights was a beauty to behold.
At home, we hid our Strand books away until the first night of Hanukkah (yesterday). It was the perfect day in the city together, and we all agreed it'll be our new holiday tradition.
How 'bout you? Do you have a favorite holiday tradition? Let's hear it--I'm all ears!
One of the tricky things about having a blog is that it takes a bit of time for it to find its "friends"--the faithful readers who share your interests and your general views of the world.
As I'm heading towards the 2.5-year mark of blogging here at Joyfully Green, I'd like to say a warm "thank you!" to those of you who have been with me from the very beginning, as well as "welcome!" and "I'm so glad you're here!" to the new friends who have found my little corner of the internet. I'm really so touched by your kindness and support, and am always happy to hear from you. On that note, I got this lovely message recently at my Joyfully Green Facebook page:
I've been receiving Joyfully Green since Christmas 2012. I want to personally thank you for the beautiful, quiet photos. I am 76, still cook daily and enjoy baking new recipes. I too have been taking photos since a teenager with my Brownie. Still love the art of photography!
(It's amazing how a few kind words can lift us up, isn't it? What if we all took a little time today to send a note to somebody whose work we appreciate? Thanks, Denise, for the inspiration!)
For this weekend's round-up of Joyful Reads, I wanted to share some of my very early posts about winter and the holidays that most of you probably missed the first time around, when it was just me, my relatives, and the crickets. I hope you enjoy them!
Well, I'm feeling quite thankful--and just plain full!--so I want to get right to this weekend's joyful reads. They're an inspiring bunch, I must say. They've all given me some delicious food for thought about gratitude, the holidays, and love.
From Tricia at Little Eco Footprints: 'Tis the Season to be Creative (because I absolutely love her reasoning for giving just two Christmas gifts to her daughter).
From Carlynn at jjbegonia:So I Found This Quote... (because sometimes, you just have to look at your "problems" from a different angle).
From Carol at Ahh the Simple Life:Better Ways to Give (because the title says it all).
From Claire at Just a Little Less:Gratitude Not Grudge (because gratitude really is just waiting for you to find it).
From Katia at I am the Milk:If I Had to Write Your Obituary (because it's the most heartfelt "thank-you note" I've read in a very long time).
Start off the new year with a new skill: My photography e-course, "How to Take Better Photos of Nature and the World Around You" will be running again this January! Save $15 with the Early Bird Discount if you enroll before Wednesday, December 3, 2014 at 11:59 pm EST. (If giving the course as a gift, please let me know the name and email of the student in the PayPal comment section at checkout.)Click here for details and registration.
I've often written here about how I don't like shopping anymore, so you won't catch me busting down any doors in the wee hours of Black Friday. But, let's face it, I'm still going to get the kids a few gifts for Hanukkah. They're young (7 and 10) and wouldn't exactly appreciate a lecture on the pitfalls of consumerism!
Still, for me, there are plenty of ways to spread the joy (no pun intended) without compromising how I feel about buying a bunch of meaningless stuff in a jam-packed mall. So, here are a few of my ideas for the gift-giving season--and they're not just for kids' gifts:
Figure out beforehand what you're going to give to whom, and don't get suckered in to impulse purchases at the check-out. Gifts are more special when you put a little thought into them, instead of just grabbing random stuff that could be given to anybody.
Encourage a budding interest or talent. When I was growing up, I pivoted between wanting to be a writer, a photographer, and an artist, so my family gave me gifts like a Kodak Pocket Instamatic, art supplies, and (much later) the annual Writer's Market. Those gifts literally led me to where I am today. (How many gifts can you say THAT about?!)
Stocking-stuffers often add up to a lot of meaningless, poorly made stuff. Resist the urge to fill up on junk from the dollar store.
Frame some sentimental photographs for gifts. Yes, I know I'm biased because I'm a photographer! But I still think old family photos make some of the most beautiful and meaningful gifts.
Let your kids choose a charity. My children always fight over which one of them gets to push elevator buttons. When I asked them why, my son said, "Because this is one area where we kids get to control something!" (Insightful, don't you think?) So, give your children some charity catalogs and let them decide on a donation from your family. My children love Heifer International because they can read about how different farm animals contribute to helping poverty-stricken villages. (Tip: Set a dollar limit on the charity gift beforehand, so they'll know which items to rule out.)
Give music. Let the kids choose a certain number of songs to buy on iTunes. (A no-clutter gift, and again, they'll have fun making the decisions.)
Opt for lessons. My daughter asked if she could pleeeeeeease have piano lessons for one of her Hanukkah gifts. (With pleasure!) When you give your friends or family the gift of a new skill, one they can enjoy for many years ahead, they will always remember that you were the one who started them along the path.
Your full attention and affection is the most valuable gift. So, give experiences instead of things.
How 'bout you? Have you ever participated in the mall madness on Black Friday? Got any good ideas for meaningful holiday gifts? Let's hear it in the comments section below--I'm all ears!
Start off the new year with a new skill: My photography e-course, "How to Take Better Photos of Nature and the World Around You" will be running again this January! Save $15 with the Early Bird Discount if you enroll before Wednesday, December 3, 2014 at 11:59 pm EST. (If giving the course as a gift, please let me know the name and email of the student in the PayPal comment section at checkout.)Click here for details and registration.
This week's photos, just by happy coincidence, are all animal-related--even if they're not all photographs of actual animals. For example, the plant above is called "Hens and Chicks." I love Hens and Chicks! I would've bought two or three of these plants today, but the snooty florist had a bee in her bonnet. Bad service = no sale!
The little guy below was very attentive, though. We met him at a local farm. I think he was hoping that I was packing a few carrots in my purse. Goats have such interesting eyes, don't they?
For the last couple of years, my children have been collecting donations for the animal rescue organization that saved our wonderful dog, in lieu of birthday presents from their friends. (Yes, I am a proud mom!) My daughter is pictured below, delivering some of the bags of dog food that were almost as big as she is!
While we were at Eleventh Hour Rescue, some thoroughly adorable kittens were brought in for adoption. If I weren't allergic to cats (something I sadly developed in adulthood), we would have arrived home with two or three more whiskered friends, I'm sure. Just look at this precious little face...
We ended the week with monkeys! Dropping off kids' outgrown clothes and shopping for "new" camp clothes at Little Monkeys consignment shop. I love consignment shops! They're one of the greenest things around. If you haven't ever visited a consignment shop, look them up in your area and give 'em a try!
Hens, chicks, goats, dogs, cats, and monkeys...yep, I guess you could say it was one wild week!
Well, that's a lofty title, isn't it? However, it speaks to one of my favorite topics at this time of year: Giving meaningful experiences as holiday gifts instead of giving STUFF and all the things that STUFF entails (manufacturing, packaging, shipping, and cluttering up your house, just for starters). Far be it from me to alarm you, but one of our neighbors decked out his yard for Christmas on the weekend before Halloween (he wins the dubious award for the earliest-ever decorations), so for the past few weeks, the holidays have been tip-toeing around inside my head. With two children under age 10, believe me, the holidays are never far off our radar.
I'm just hazarding a guess, but your kids--like our kids--probably don't need a whole slew of new toys for the holidays. Long after they've lost most of their 8,786 Legos (the dog chewing up about 21% of them, another 32% scattered under various couches and beds, and another 17% lost along with the mysteriously vanishing solo socks), they'll still remember the night you took them to see a world-famous musician, which is what we did on Saturday night. We took our children to see virtuoso violinist Itzhak Perlman.
My son, who is 9, has been playing the violin for the past year, so he was particularly excited about the evening. My daughter, who is 6, was hyped-up as well, but mainly because it was a great excuse to wear her favorite dress with the fox on it, along with its matching fox tights.
She had a rather abstract, six-year-old's understanding that this was a Very Important Person we were watching perform, but what really made the concert more fun for her was when I told her to listen carefully to each piece of music and imagine what story the composer and the violinist were trying to tell together. After each piece was over, during the robust applause, she would lean in to say things such as "that song was about a family of bunnies running around in a meadow."
For me, I'll just say that I didn't know any living person could produce such a wide range of exquisite notes on a violin, so effortlessly and expressively, all without any of those strident, screechy sounds reminiscent of stepping on a cat's tail. He played without an orchestra, just a pianist for accompaniment, so we could really focus on the sweetness of the violin. Imagine the following transcendent piece of music (which he played as one of the encores), stripped back to the simple purity of a violin and a piano:
But the best part of the night for me was sitting three rows behind my son (he and my husband had the last two available front-row balcony seats) and watching my little boy witness somebody whom he admires, doing what they (my son and, presumably, Itzhak Perlman) love to do.
We had a similar kind of experience when we went to a Yankees game last year and my son got to meet Derek Jeter, his hero, before the game. After receiving a personally autographed ball from the very tall and very charming Mr. Jeter, who loped off to meet some other adoring fans, my son turned to me and whispered, "Mom, I'm so glad I didn't go through with my plan to pretend to faint!" That's right: He was so nervous and didn't know what he would say if he actually met Derek Jeter, so that had been his plan--to feign fainting. But he didn't "faint", and he did manage to talk coherently to his hero, and now we have this picture below to remember that golden morning of his life. Even without the picture, I don't think he'd ever have forgotten it. Which is more than I can say for the time he received his seventh box of Legos or his thirtieth stuffed animal. Yes, he enjoyed and appreciated them, but they're just not in the same league. (Sorry, couldn't resist.)
So, this holiday season, consider thinking outside the box for gifts. Literally. Instead of giving more STUFF, think of an experience you can give to your children, or your significant other, or even yourself--an experience to make you smile on a gloomy day when you don't feel like smiling, a few positively magical hours to look back on with warmth and fondness for years to come. What activity does your child (or your spouse, or your dad) love to do, and who in the world is really good at it? Is there an opportunity for you to bring the two people together within the next year? Yes, these types of experiences tend to be more expensive than your average gift (and I've already suggested ideas for gifts that cost little or nothing--see the linked articles below). But for me, I'd rather give one really great experience than twenty-five gifts of STUFF that will get lost in the back of a closet.
Your turn: Have you ever given or received a really special experience as a gift? Met somebody you've long admired? Please share in the Comments section below. If you are reading this post via email subscription or mobile device, click on the title or go to www.JoyfullyGreen.com from a computer to see the comments and leave one of your own. (Don't forget to click the box for subscribing to comments so you can follow the conversation.)
(c) 2013 by Joy Sussman/JoyfullyGreen.com. All rights reserved. Photos and text digitally fingerprinted and watermarked. Site licensed by Creative Commons.
Okay, let's just file this True Story under "Over-Indulgent Parents": I know a mom who took her two children on a surprise trip to Disney World, but bought all of their Disney stuffed animals, "mouse ears", and princess costumes before the trip (secretly packing an extra suitcase), because she knew the same toys would be marked up inside the theme park and she didn't want to disappoint the kids by saying "no" to the souvenirs. I know she meant well, but it would seem (to me, anyway) that the plane tickets, the hotel room, the rental car and the gas, three restaurant meals and snacks each day for two parents and two kids, and a week's worth of park admission tickets to Disney World (have you seen those Disney ticket prices lately?) are more than enough of a gift to the kids, without throwing in a suitcase full of souvenirs that were probably all made in China.
Why do we buy souvenirs, anyway? Do we buy them to prove an experience happened, fearful we'll forget it if we don't have physical evidence of the place that we visited? Do we buy them to show off a fabulous vacation to our envious friends? Are we hoping to sprinkle a little of the vacation magic into our "real lives" which are not nearly as relaxing or glamorous as our getaways? Especially in America, where the standard vacation is two weeks off at the start of a job, perhaps we are trying to stave off the hunger for the next vacation by savoring a little taste of the last one? Do we buy souvenirs for the kids just because we want to avoid the whining and begging? (I've found one way to avert this last problem: I tell my kids that the toys live at the store. They don't question it, because what child wants to take someone away from his or her rightful home? Works for me!)
Generally, I am not a fan of giftshops, especially the ones that you have to walk through to exit the tourist attraction (seriously, what evil genius invented those?). However, if you're on the sentimental side like I am, sometimes you really do want to take home a little something special from the trip. (The key word there is "special", so you can skip the plastic snowglobes, nerve-rattling noise-makers, and polyester T-shirts.) Here are a few ideas for greener souvenirs, none of them made in China, and all of them more meaningful:
Keep a trip journal--online or traditional spiral-bound. Even better, have your kids write some entries.
Make a sketch. Or have your kids draw or paint a picture of your family on the trip. Frame it or just hang it with a magnet on the fridge.
Take photos, and lots of them--it's so easy in the digital age to snap away. You can (and should) edit ruthlessly later. Let your kids snap some photos--their viewpoints are priceless. Plus, how else are you going to get pictures of yourself on the vacation?
Free from the beach: The "perfect" stone; some pretty shells; a handful of pure white sand to keep in a recyled glass jar, labeled with the beach it's from.
Ask the waiter if you can have a recipe from the chef (or at least the gist of it) and recreate the dish at home.
Have a "Recollection Night" before you go. See below...
On the final night of our life-changing, two-week trip to Israel last year, my mother-in-law gathered our extended family--all eleven of us--in one of our hotel rooms and passed out a little informal survey, asking things like "What was your favorite meal on the trip?", "What was the most exciting thing you did?", "What did you learn about the country?", and "What was the funniest moment of the vacation?" Truth be told, the idea seemed a little corny at first, but you know what? It was so much fun to go around the circle and collectively remember our thoroughly amazing trip. Mental mementos: They're free, 100% green, perfect for sharing, and best of all, they don't take up any suitcase space!
Your turn: What's your favorite souvenir from a vacation--and was it purchased, created, or found? Are you able to avoid the magnetic pull of the souvenir shop? Please share in the Comments section below. If you are reading this post via email subscription or mobile device, click on the title or go to www.JoyfullyGreen.com from a computer to see the comments and leave one of your own.
Your turn: Is the balance between your work and your personal life out of whack? Or do you keep your priorities in check when it's within your control to do so? Please share in the Comments section below. If you are reading this post via email subscription or mobile device, click on the title or go to www.JoyfullyGreen.com from a computer and you can leave a comment at the original post.
(c) 2013 by Joy Sussman/JoyfullyGreen.com. All rights reserved. Photos and text digitally fingerprinted and protected by MyFreeCopyright.com. Site licensed by Creative Commons.
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This weekend, my husband and I made good on Part 2 of our solo-time gifts for our kids. (See "Greening the Holiday Gift-Giving".) He took our five-year-old daughter out for Chinese food and ice-skating (above); I took our nine-year-old son out for Japanese food and bowling. For Part 1 last month, I took our daughter out for frozen yogurt (yes, her choice in January!) and pottery-painting; my husband took our son out for Italian food and model ship-building. There was something really soul-satisfying and peaceful about spending dedicated afternoons with our children--and not because they weren't together to bicker with each other. It was because we were actively showing them how much we cherish them. How deserving they are of our undivided attention. That they are not only important and worthy, but fun and enjoyable companions. We could say those things all we want, but words are just words and they require action to make them come alive.
When I was eating sushi with my son, I decided to take a few photos of him across the table from me. He smiled and did his best funny faces for a few clicks, but then he said, "Mom, I'd rather have a picture of us together. I don't want it to look like I'm all alone and don't need my parents anymore." (Melt...) So he came over to my side of the booth and the waitress took a picture of us--together.
There is no toy, DVD, or game system that could have bested these afternoons. My only regret is that we didn't think of this gift idea sooner. On the drive home, my son asked me, "Can we have these presents for every holiday?" Yes and no. Yes, we can have more one-parent-one-child afternoons, but no, we won't need a special holiday or occasion for them.
What was the best gift you ever received? Was it manufactured, hand-made, or none of the above?
It's that time of year again--a time for looking back, taking stock, thinking of the most memorable things that happened within the last twelve months. And of course, it's the time of year that we get deluged with lists! The 10 Best Movies of the Year. The 10 Most Intriguing People. The 10 Best Top 10 Lists...well, you get the drift. So who am I to buck the trend? Following are My 10 Favorite Green Resources for 2012 (in no particular order). These are the environmental blogs, books, and ideas that have inspired me to be ever-greener. Just think of them as 10 holiday gifts from me to you--gifts that keep on giving, are clutter-free, plastic-free, battery-free, and just plain FREE. And please, feel free to re-gift them! (Note: The books are still free if you get them from the library.)
1. Little Eco Footprints.I subscribe to many green blogs, but my #1, must-read-it, always-love-it blog is Little Eco Footprints. The blog's writer, Tricia, lives in Australia with her husband and adorable daughter (whom she refers to as "Little Eco"). As she introduces herself: "I write here about learning to live better with less. I dream of living close to nature; having space to grow food; having a little ecological footprint; and being part of a community." Her goal for the past year was to avoid shopping malls and big-box stores, and to support local farms and merchants instead. I love her recipe for homemade play dough--there's just something magical about a hunk of fresh dough that turns every child into a wannabe Auguste Rodin.
2. Beth Terry's blog, My Plastic-Free Life. Think of this as a companion piece to her habit-changing book on the same subject (which I'll review in a future post). I haven't come across anyone better than Beth Terry for researching the monumental problem of plastics in our society, and suggesting what we can personally and collectively do about that problem--all without the "gloom and doom" factor.
3. The Omnivore's Dilemma by Michael Pollan.Yes, I know this book was published in 2007; however, this is the year that I finally got around to reading it--and now I wish that I'd read it sooner. Thanks to this book, no more McDonald's food for me (or at least a drastic reduction of it--since I read the book in January, I've taken the kids to McDonald's exactly three times, when we were seriously on the fly). Also thanks to this book: My addiction to Pepsi has been kicked, cold-turkey.
4. Richard Louv's blog: Children & Nature Network. As I wrote in my review of Last Child in the Woods (see sidebar entitled "Green Books for Adults" on the home page), I feel like I grew up with Richard Louv. His childhood was so similar to mine, with a neighborhood full of children all outside, playing together, and exploring from morning 'til evening. Now, his blog continues the inspiring work that he began with his books--citing studies of the changing times, and suggesting how we can re-introduce nature into family life. He's consistently interesting and informative.
5. Posie Gets Cozy. Technically, this choice is not an environmental blog. However, in the green spirit of unplugging and simplifying, Alicia Paulson posts exquisite photos not only of Oregon (I really must visit someday...), but also of the beautiful simplicity of everyday life, of home-made food and hand-sewn things, of quiet moments, of people and pets she cherishes. It's so peaceful and calming, and is the perfect antidote to technological overload. If you've had a long day and night at your desk, filled with number-crunching and telephoning, then make your last stop of the night here, at Alicia's home, before you turn off your computer. Sweet dreams!
6. The Minimalist Mom. Rachel Jonat, the Canadian author of The Minimalist Mom blog (who currently lives on the Isle of Man), inspires me with every single post. I just discoved her blog within the last month, but there's such a treasure trove to dig through in her archives. My two favorite articles so far are Toy Clutter Confessional and Farewell Facebook. Jonat makes so many thoughtful points, I want to follow them all--in moderation. As I said in my post entitled The Many Shades of Green (or: "Get Off Your Green High Horse!"), we're not all at the same levels of environmentalism--and the same goes for minimalism. (By the way, Jonat admits that she's not 100% minimalist either.)
7. Clean. This blog, written by Rachel Jepson Wolf, is subtitled "Your (Crafty, Organic, Bubble-Filled) Happy Place." Gotta love that. I also love the nature photos, tutorials, and good humor, such as this photo of a puppy licking off the Thanksiving dishes completely inside of the dishwasher (scroll down within the link). Plus, Rachel's children are ethereally beautiful, and if I believed that children should be models (my jury is still out on that case), I'd tell her to sign them up, STAT. Her photos of them are just amazing.
8. Treehugger and Live Green. Be Green (LGBG). Yes, I know--those are two things, not one. But they are different sides of the same coin. If you've got a lot of free time (does anybody?), then Treehugger.com is your definitive resource for everything green under the sun. But, if you want a concise, more manageable recap of what's going on in the (green) world this week, that's where LGBG comes in. They research a wide range of green news and then hand-pick the highlights, along with links to the original sources where you can read further (if or when you find that free time). The site isn't just green news stories, though--they also offer good ideas like putting together an earth-friendly holiday party. (Disclosure: LGBG recently featured Joyfully Green [thank you again, LGBG!]; however, I'd been reading and enjoying their blog before they contacted me to let me know about their review.)
9. Go Explore Nature. Blogger Debi Huang and I are like-minded mothers living on opposite coasts. We're both trying our best to nurture a deep appreciation of nature in our children by creatively exploring the outdoors. Actually, she's much better at getting her kids outdoors than I am (probably due in part to the fact that she lives in sunny L.A. and not the chilly Northeast, so she can do things like taking her kids on nighttime strolls in their pajamas during the holidays). But, she also offers up trillions of creative nature projects that you and your kids can make indoors or out. I particularly like her twig stars (which can be made to celebrate Hanukkah, too), and her "Give a Kid a Camera" series.
10. Get Going, Get Green! Blogger Fredi Baker is a self-proclaimed "green geek," but she's also a tireless investigator of everyday things that could use some serious second thoughts. She's delved into everything from the spooky facts about Halloween candy to fossil fuels in airplanes. It's a big world out there, and somehow, she's covering all of it (or large swaths of it!), with a view to greening it. Lofty goals, down-to-earth writing. Love it.
I hope you will enjoy these "gifts" as much as I do. Happy holidays, and have a happy, green new year!
Food for thought: Do you have any green websites, blogs, or books that inspired you this past year?